Holistic Family of the Month Iya Raet interviews Dera Baskin and Emmanuel (Emma) Owusu-Bonsu
How long have you two been parents?
For almost two years.
How did you prepare for your birth?
I purchased a birth kit and the additional materials necessary for a water birth at home: tub, water hose, sheets, and plastic, etc. As far as the immediate stuff, food and juice, I was actually supposed to buy that on Tuesday. However, my contractions began on Tuesday, so I did not get a chance to by them. We practiced our meditation techniques nightly and I reviewed the Bradley book as well as materials from my birth class, and midwife to keep the information fresh. We set up the tub, went to lunch, and walked around the neighborhood. For the most part our day was like any other day, we just relaxed and tried to make sure we set up the bedroom, laid down the plastic, and brought all the birth materials into the room with the tub.
Did you make any specific dietary changes during your birth?
We are vegetarians. I did have to make sure I was getting my protein by eating more protein rich foods. I took supplements such as DHA, spirulina, and iron. For the most part I ate the same foods as before, during and after pregnancy. I read a lot about specific foods creating discomfort for both the mother and baby, but I did not experience any discomfort from these food items, such as spicy foods, and cabbage.
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Can you tell me a little bit about your birth?
It was amazing. I would not have changed anything about it. When I woke up Tuesday morning I knew that "it" was going to happen. I told Emma "today is the day". We did not call anyone right away. I called my friend that morning around 11am to let her know I’d been in labor since the night before. She was the assistant to Emma. I didn’t actually give birth on Tuesday, but I did go into labor Tuesday night. It was a 16 hour labor, during which I slept in between contractions. I went from the bed to the floor, to sitting on the edge of the bathtub trying to get comfortable. Finally, at about 4 am I found a comforting position and stayed that way until my midwife arrived at 8 am. I went on a walk, had some snacks, did some squats, and walked some more. After walking down my block one last time my water broke and we were in action. Obi was here within the next 45 minutes! I took a shower and decided to get into the birthing tub. We planned a water birth, but the water had gotten too cold. I stayed there a minute and began to feel the urge to push. At this point we decided it would be best to go to the bedroom, where I pushed twice and Obi slid into the world. Emma was so excited. He just kept asking “is he coming, is that him, is that him?” When he finally saw Obi he was tickled with a nervous laugh as he held him in his arms. It was a long labor, but a very easy birth. Very stress free, peaceful and I was able to relax my body throughout the contracts. I relaxed my mind and welcomed the contractions. I knew that was the only way for Obi to come forth. I meditated; I was very calm, and serene. So much that my friend who attended the birth told everyone that I made it look easy! Ha
Why did you choose a homebirth?
We chose a home birth because we are both pretty "anti-hospital”. Hospitals are for sick people and pregnancy is not a disease, neither is giving birth. My mom was really into herbs and doing things naturally, so it was like second nature for me to have a home birth. Emmanuel was really excited to have a home birth as well. It allowed us to have more control and a better understanding of what is taking place, rather than putting all the responsibility on someone else to tell us what to do. Not to mention that I had a doctor the first 7 months of my pregnancy and I did not enjoy it. I felt like I had to have a doctor because my insurance paid for it. But around 5 months I started looking into birth centers and hospitals that allowed midwives. I got a consultation with an independent midwife and at that moment I knew it was the best choice.
Many families choose water birth. Did it alleviate a lot of the pain?
Well I was actually only in the water for about 5 minutes. We had a temperature issue. It was too hot then too cold. By the time I was ready for the water, the water wasn’t ready for me. So instead of being insistent on having a “water birth”, I went ahead to the room to have Obi. While I was in the water it did alleviate a little pressure, because of the buoyancy. During that time I was getting the urge to push and so that little time in there was helpful. My pain factor was very intense but I realized that it was in my mind. I think I did a pretty good job of focusing on relaxing and letting my body do what I needed it to do.
Was music an important aspect of your pregnancy? How important is music in your home now with a toddler?
Music is very important in our home. During our pregnancy, we played drums, went to drum circles, performed together in concerts, played flutes, sang, danced, and everything! We have some instruments and Obi plays them all. Drums are his favorite. He enjoys the flute, ukulele, guitar, and bells. I don’t think there is a moment when music is not being played. Anytime Obi hears any consistent beat or rhythm he starts to dance and sing. I think music makes him more aware of himself and promotes his creativity.
Is your son still breastfeeding? Why do you think breastfeeding is so important?
Obi is still breastfeeding and I plan to let him wean himself. Breastfeeding is important because it promotes the relationship between the mother and child. Not only is it immunity boost and provide nutrients to the baby, it is also good for the mother. For me it gave me a time to relax and reflect on my day. Especially, after working a full day. I can just stare into Obi’s eyes and talk to him, encourage him, and share my intentions with him. I think it’s a security blanket for Obi, instead of some other tangible item to cling to for comfort; Obi has his mommy, as he should. I think breastfeeding provides a sense of stability for the child, and as a result gives him/her a better sense of self.
Do you feel that there is a major need to see Afrikan families in holistic-centered publications?
There is a major need for Afrikan families in publications promoting holistic lifestyles. It really bothers me when I receive some of my publications and there is nothing in the magazines about Afrikans. Or rarely anything I can relate to on a cultural level. I do get something out of the publication, but there always seems to be a missing piece. I advocate that we, as Afrikan parents submit articles to these publications, because we are part of the constituency. At any rate, I was/am so excited to see an Afrikan Queen conceptualize and create the space for an Afrikan centered publication about holistic parenting. It is very affirming for my spirit to have the support of other families to network and assist one another in this experiment called parenting. I am happy to be able to promote and support these publications, as well as contribute to the cause.
Do you feel that there are many resources for holistic Afrikan families? Are you finding that the community is growing?
I think sometimes people start out with good intentions of maintaining a holistic lifestyle for their families, but often we get so much slack from family and friends. It then becomes very rigid and difficult. Some people just give up because it’s definitely “easier” to do what is mainstream. There are many individuals doing what they do, but I have not really found a coherent network of Afrikan families in my area. I do have support among a few families which is great and have actually been thinking of starting something up for the families of color in greater LA to promote breastfeeding and nutrition. I think there are resources; however you really have to do your research, as you should, to find resources that are serious and consistent. The community is growing so I do anticipate networks and publications such as this manifest, which is great! It affirms that we have support within our communities and can create a space to take a greater ownership of the community effort to promote and maintain the lifestyle.
What advice would you give to families considering natural birth?
I am an advocate for healthy women and healthy pregnancies. Even if you have your baby in the hospital you can have your baby naturally. Your body was made to do it! Women have been giving birth to new life naturally for centuries. You can do anything you put your mind to; it’s all in your head. It’s totally doable. Find a support of other women who have/will have a natural birth and talk to them about your concerns and intentions. Create a birth plan, make sure your OB/GYN is in support of a natural birth and is open to your birth plan. If you can afford a doula, get one. Or have a supportive partner/birth coach. It is just as good and free! Meditate and practice relaxation techniques. One thing I definitely recommend is to talk to your baby about the birth day. He/she hears and understands. Tell him/her to practice turning their head down, spin against mommy’s tummy, with arms crossed over his/her heart. I told Obi to practice, so when it was time, he’d be ready to come into this realm safely and without complication.
Dera Baskin is mother of Obi Owusu-Bonsu, 19-months-old. She is co-owner of Wax Gems, specializing in natural wax candles. She is also training to be a doula (natural birth support professional) and natural birth educator. Contact: dera@wanlov.com .
Wanlov, Emmanuel Owusu-Bonsu is an eclectic Ghanaian music artist who relocated to Los Angeles by way of Texas. He is currently has a new album, "Greencard" and cares for his son Obi. He promotes and lives a natural and holistic lifestyle with his youth and wife.
Wanlov's 20-track album, GREENCARD is enlivened with titles spelled in stereotypical Ghanaian words like “Supa Chompia” and “Choptime.” Coupled with stories reminiscence of childhood experiences by most Ghanaians, Wanlov does a great job of pulling listeners into his memories through his songs. His love for Ghana is exhibited throughout the album as almost every song seems to be Ghana-inspired. Some of the fine tunes found in “Choptime” and Chinese Kokonte” are tweaked with “jama-like” rhythms – beats used during interschool sporting activities in Ghana – while others like “In Ghana” mildly echo with traditional sounds. It almost becomes a fun album that demonstrates his eclectic style. Green Card is currently available at www.wanlov.com, www.myspace.com/wanlov, itunes, www.cdbaby.com, and www.digstation.com.
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